Numi Numi

I just got back from a very special Women's Chorus rehearsal and I really want to share. Sorry for the length, but honestly, I probably could have gone on and on.  

Women's Chorus is singing a song, Reflections from Yad Vashem, which was written based on the composer's life-changing experience at the Children's Memorial in Jerusalem. (quick shout out: we'll be singing it at our March 30th Concert! Buy tickets!)  

(this has been added to my "to go" list, for sure) 

The music itself is so eerie and dark, with some text from Genesis that gives me chills. Then, the names.

 We sing the names of some children that were killed in the Holocaust: 

Israel Ofrecht, 

Ytzkahk Faierman, 

Tommy Kolmar, 

Claude Naxara, 

Sarah Fleischmann, 

Bella Ostrinkskaya. 

The song progresses, with more dissonance, more accidentals, more, more, more, then the climax: 

Be thou the mother of thousands of millions. 

Then almost complete silence followed by the humble "pivotal moment," as Sister Applonie called it. 

"Pristine oblivion of wind whispered, wind whispered names and candle flame, Infinite space and the faces, the faces of children by mercy reclaimed." 

from Merriam-Webster: 

reclaim: 

1. to recall from wrong or improper conduct

2. to rescue from an undesirable state; also : to restore to a previous natural state

Sister Applonie's insight was this: this part of the piece is the veil, where the children who have been killed from the horrific genocide no longer have to endure it. They are welcomed by Christ into the next life, they are reclaimed by mercy. 

The end of the piece is light compared to the heavy, heart-sickening melody of the beginning. It's a Hebrew lullaby. Sister Applonie shared that she is certain that it is those on the other side of the veil singing this lullaby to the children. 

That to me is another testament that there is life after death. There is. Christ has suffered it all so that we can live again. Christ suffered what those little children had to. He knew what they went through. His mercy reclaimed them. 

It is also another testament to me that those who have passed the veil are still close. I love that the angels are singing these children a lullaby, giving them a piece of their childhood that was stripped from them, giving them peace, saying "sleep now." 

I can't fully write my feelings about this song and the emotions it provokes, but again, to me it is a testament of the Plan of Happiness. 

Just a Ride

As I was studying furiously for my Book of Mormon test today, I read this quote. For me, it 

clarified something: accountability and reliability are two different things. Hit home 

to me today. Just thought I'd share. 

Q: In your book, you talk about "taking responsibility for your life." Is that an attitude or a 

different way of doing things?

  A: It's really a choice and an attitude. I had a mentor in my 20s, and the first thing he taught 

me was, you have to take 100 percent responsibility for life. I 

didn't know what that meant.

  He said, "Well, do you ever blame anybody about anything? Do you ever complain about anything?"

 I said, "Sure." He said, "Then you don't take 100 percent responsibility. If you did, you 

would always take the position that you are creating whatever's 

going on in your life, including your feelings, your results, the quality of your relationships, 

the money you have, your health. You would always ask 

yourself, 'How am I creating this?' "

  But if you take the attitude that you're a victim, and other people are responsible, then you 

won't be looking, then you won't find anything, and then you'll 

never have a way to improve. (Mary A. Jacobs, Dallas Morning News, 1/29/2005)

Some Nights

Some nights are productive. 

Some nights are so long they fade into morning.  

Some nights are tiring. 

Some nights are a grand ole time. 

Some nights are just down right hilarious. 

Some nights are stressful. 

Some nights are carefree and full of dance parties. 

And for your next teeny-bopper dance craze phase extravaganza: 

SHOUTOUT to ma awesome ROOMMATE for introducing me to this catchy jam.  

Guavaberry

Feeling a little nostalgic today. Or a lot nostalgic. 

A few memories of the DR

I remember dancing around my parent's bedroom with my sisters to good ole Juan Luis. 

I remember a pink bathtub. with stairs.

I remember a flat roof with a basketball hoop. 

 I remember asking for a picnic of pickles and "leche chocolate." 

I remember the rain. Oh, the rain. 

And the rain fights. 

I remember the swing. 

Delfina. The swimming dog. 

I remember learning to swim. (Thanks, Em!)

I remember that pool. And the shed. That my brothers jumped off all the time. 

I remember a farm with bulls the size of a building. 

I remember a music box. 

All My Loving

A little taste of my Valentine's week...

While I'm away, I'll write home everyday and I'll send all my loving to you. 

The Battle in our Brains 

(From http://segullah.org/daily-special/the-battle-in-our-brains/#comments) 

Several months ago I attended the Mormon Women Project Salon Event, at which I heard Tina Peterson speak. The title for her breakout session was, “Becoming a Deliberate Student of the Gospel.” Tina has a degree in Near Eastern Studies and has studied the Old and New Testament in their original languages from multiple sources including the Dead Sea Scrolls.

“That’s where you need to be,” I said to myself. So I chose her class. And by the end of the evening, it was Tina’s words that stayed with me most. They hung in my mind for weeks. She so revolutionized my study and thinking that, with her permission, I share what she taught here.

Tina first talked about the mechanics of effective scripture study. They were the standard “should-dos” until she got to #4.

1. Pray before you begin.
2. Read, cross-reference, immerse yourself in the texts.
3. Keep a notepad and pencil near you. Write down every impression that comes to you, without dismissing thoughts that may seem random or out of context.
4. Over time, look back at what you have written and search for patterns. Trends and themes will emerge. You will see what the Holy Ghost is trying to teach you.

 

Wow, I thought. I jot down notes, scribble in the margins, underline in various colors, but looking for patterns, themes, and messages over time? That hadn’t occurred to me.

Then Tina got serious, because we were short on time, and she said, “Now I’m going to tell you what I feel strongly you need to hear.” We were listening.

“The battle today, between Babylon and Zion, is being waged between the synapses of our brains.”

(I’m no neurologist, but I’ve had enough physiology to know that synapses are how our brains process messages. They are crucial to the biological computation of perception and thought.)

Tina explained that in this information age when messages, images, and information are coming at us almost faster than we can receive them, our brains are creating new neural pathways to accommodate the input. The first time we see an image on a screen (we’re not talking about pornography here, although it does apply) – like a blog page, a news feed, texts, or facebook – our brain creates a new neural pathway to process that image. It is the same with new sounds or any stimuli to the senses, but let’s use the visual image for this discussion.

Input always travels the path of least resistance. So the second time we see the new image, it will travel the same route. And before long, the new neural pathway has been stimulated enough to “desire” of itself continued activation. A habit is born.

After that, when the brain is not currently occupied, we long for that image. That is why we constantly check our phones or email. That is why, when we have a free moment, we click onto a favorite blog, check facebook, and tweets, or any other source of input we frequent. Without realizing it, we have begun to crave these places of input, hunger for them, to the point where they can surreptitiously dominate our time.

Tina said the only way to counterbalance this is with ancient and modern scripture. We must expose our brains repeatedly to the image or sound of God’s words. Printed, glowing on the page, read aloud, or discussed with friends. That is where God’s Spirit lives. It is where His mind and will can rise out of the texts we read or the conversations we share, and filter into our lives, allowing revelation to move through us.

Satan knows the physiology of the brain. He knows if he can encourage overstimulation through an overload of mundane or technical information, he can increase the odds that we will not seek more spiritual sources for input, thus making scripture study tedious.

Recent studies have also shown that when our minds are over-stimulated, we begin to make decisions without considering the consequences. Much of the time, these quick decisions are not the best ones for us. An abundance of “information” prompts reactionary responses and elevates feelings of anxiety. All of this distracts us from the peace the Lord offers through His Word, and deprives us of much needed pondering time – time when our minds can reinforce more spiritual pathways.

Then Tina said this,

“Your time with the word of the Lord is your personal Urim and Thummim. It is there that God will speak to you. Frequent the scriptures often enough that your brain craves that kind of input – that your day feels incomplete without it.”

Have you been there? That place of truly feasting on God’s word? I have. And I’m sure you have too. I love how Jeremiah describes it.

“Thy words were found, and I did eat them; and thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart” (Jeremiah 15:16).

I have also been in that place where I don’t crave the scriptures, because my reading is sporadic, even neglectful. And in retrospect, I can see I have filled my precious time with things that matter much less.

After hearing Tina talk, I realized I can’t afford to neglect my time in the scriptures. I can’t risk being a voice to my children, my friends, or the Relief Society sisters I teach, if I am not partaking regularly of God’s word. Time with the word of the Lord is its own system of checks and balances for me. It’s how the Lord rights me, keeps me on course.

Naturally, the sources of input mentioned here are not bad things. But Tina’s words have helped me make a conscious effort to open my scriptures each day before computer time, reading any other book, or another leisurely activity. I have started recording impressions. And it is astounding the level of happy confidence I have felt. I am still working on the habit, but I’m getting better at hearing as I go. “The words of the Lord are pure words, said the Psalmist, and I am discovering that within them we can see things “as they really are and as they really will be” (Jacob 4:13).

What about you? How is your scripture study going? What do you think of this battle in the brain? 

Moon River

"Two drifters off to see the world. There's such a lot of world to see. We're after the same rainbow's end, waiting round the bend, my huckleberry friend, moon river, and me." 

Husband, we will travel, won't we? 

Can't Stop Thinking About You

Oh, how you draw me in every time. There's a need to always see you, and be with you. I'm done with that. You heard me, I'm through with you.

I'm talking to YOU, Facebook.

Due to a recent discovery (through a friend) of StayFocusd, an app available on Google Chrome (YEAH GOOGLE), this fantastic little device gives me a set limit PER DAY on a certain website. Once I've  reached that limit, it kicks me off and tells me to get to work. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Man is good.

Good Day

It's the small things that make me happy. For example, a night to myself, watching Breakfast at Tiffany's (Very good, by the way. I loved it.) 

Sleeping in on a school day (aka, having afternoon classes) 

A slow, easy-going morning spent talking to a roommate, taking a long shower, and listening to the Beatles. 

And last, but certainly not least, finding my long lost, most favorite lipstick. (Which is Rum Raisin... fyi. Because I'm running low ;)